We all know a toxic person that we just can’t seem to get away from. It might be a co-worker, a friend or even a family member. That person who spreads negativity, enjoys pushing other people’s buttons and lives for drama. At some point or another, we all have to deal with a toxic person. The way you handle the situation can make all the difference.

Here are eight ways wise people handle toxic people:

1. They Set Boundaries

Toxic people will go on and on if you don’t make a conscious effort to stop them. When they start with their negativity, wise people let them know early on that they would rather not be a part of it. Whether it’s gossiping or complaining, find a way to excuse yourself from the conversation or cut them off before it goes too far.


2. They Hold Others Accountable

Most toxic people have a habit of playing the victim. When they begin to complain about something in their life, try pointing out the reason behind it. It may be the end of your relationship, but it’s also a way to avoid buying into their self-pity.

3. They Control Their Emotions

Toxic people are manipulators. They use different tactics to try to control you and your emotions. When dealing with a toxic person, wise people make a conscious effort to control their emotions and know exactly where they stand. If you remain on solid ground, they won’t be able manipulate you.


4. They Don’t Trust A Toxic Person

If you need a shoulder to cry on or an ear to listen, make sure you aren’t spilling your secrets to a toxic person. If you’re having a bad day and they ask you what’s wrong, know that as much as you might want to, you can’t trust them. They simply want to get information that they can gossip about later.

5. They Don’t Give Up

Toxic people usually have a talent for talking in circles. Wise people don’t give up on trying to get a straight answer from them. If you keep pushing, they’ll finally realize they can’t get away with the mind games they usually play. Make your intentions clear by asking yes or no questions during the conversation.


6. They Don’t Take It Personally

Toxic people lash out at others, manipulate and lie in order to get what they want. As much as this can hurt, it’s important to remember that it has nothing to do with you personally. Their behavior is about them and their insecurities.

7. They Forgive But Don’t Forget

Holding a grudge will only bring you down. If a toxic person hurts you or betrays you, learn from the experience and forgive in order to move on. But don’t forget. Use what happened as a reminder to surround yourself with positive people and to avoid those who are negative.


8. They Spend Time With People They Trust

The saying is true, you are who you hang out with. A wise person surrounds himself with genuine, trustworthy people who care about them and want to see them succeed. They’ll motivate you, lift you up and bring positivity into your life.

Unified Soul Theory
Psychology Today
Psych Central