Time, family, careers can all do damage to a relationship. It is easy for anyone just to go through the motions and not care for his or her partner like they should.

All relationships have hard times. I was worried about how my husband would adjust to life in South Korea when we moved there, and I was right to worry. He suffered a terrible case of culture shock and just wanted to leave. Luckily, he found a local soccer team to join, and I encouraged this. His culture shock went away in no time.

That is what relationships are about, finding a person you care about and going the distance to make sure they know you care.

Here are 12 steps that anyone can use to keep love and passion alive in his or her relationship!


1. Choose to Love Everyday

Love is a decision. Even when one does not feel like being a loving partner, they should still try to put in the effort. It is not false; it is sticking with the commitment to care for your partner. Say, “I love you!” or send cute texts during the day. Any of these little things will help one overcome the feeling of wanting to give up.

2. Put Looking in the Same Category as Touching

Be faithful in mind, spirit, and body. Looking can be the gateway to wanting more. Do not look at another the way you look at your partner. There is a difference between noticing and looking with lust. Learn the difference.

3. Ignore Unrealistic Ideals of Sex and Romance

Love and sex —as portrayed in entertainment including movies and pornography— are unrealistic and false. We cannot base a relationship on those ideals. Avoid filling your mind with those ideals and drop expectations that a real relationship will mirror those relationship fantasies.

4. Cage the Ego!

In any argument, it is important to check one’s ego. Making decisions from a place of pride is destructive. Instead, take some time to breathe and think about the argument from your partner’s point of view. Putting yourself in someone else’s shoes is the beginning of expanding awareness and improving charisma.

5. Listen

Listen to the words spoken and the words left unspoken. Take some time to really understand your partner and his or her needs.


6. Be Vulnerable

Open up and share your needs and feelings with your partner. Your partner is there, in part, to help you process through everything and lend an ear. It may be scary, but it will also make the relationship stronger.


7. Stay Healthy

Staying healthy will not only ensure a long and happy life together with one’s partner but will also increase confidence. Confidence and health are sexy!

8. Share and Chase Dreams Together

A partner is there to share dreams with and chase them. A true soul mate will help one find a way to follow their dreams. We do not have to go in alone.

9. Surprise Your Partner

There are many ways to surprise one’s partner. Try a new position in bed or prepare her/him a favorite meal. Maybe even go out and purchase his or her favorite brand of vegan ice cream. All these little things go a long way.

10. Never Lose the Excitement of the Honeymoon Phase

Plan times for special dates or mini adventures. This will keep the excitement of the honeymoon phase alive and will improve intimacy.

11. Space Helps the Relationship Grow

Sometimes, absence does make the heart grow fonder; it is healthy and natural for couples to need some space every so often. Don’t worry about taking a multi-day business trip or spending the day with friends. These things can strengthen the relationship.

12. Remember the Little Things

Just because you have a partner doesn’t mean you should stop trying. Still do little things like helping with the dishes, holding open a door, or helping your partner with their tie. These will keep appreciation alive.

Take a look at the video below for advice on how to keep a relationship strong.
He makes some great points!