There are obvious reasons why women choose to leave a relationship, such as cheating or abuse. But there are many break-ups where a man is left wondering what happened. Many women can identify with these five common reasons why they choose to end a relationship. Men, you might want to take notes.

1. She Feels Alone in the Relationship

Most women — most people — want to feel like they matter to someone. When a woman is in a relationship, she often holds her partner’s opinion above others’. She needs her partner to encourage her, support her, console her when something is wrong and just be there for her. If her partner is unavailable, emotionally or physically, she’ll start to feel alone in the relationship. Without love, support or affection, she feels like she doesn’t matter, and there is no need to stay in the relationship.

2. She Doesn’t Feel Sexy Anymore

Most women want some form of intimacy before sex. Men tend to be ready in an instant, but skipping a dinner date or a little romance can make a woman feel less than sexy, like she’s just there for her partner’s pleasure and it’s more about the sex than her. Many women crave romance in a relationship. If a woman feels like her partner doesn’t truly desire her, she has a good reason to move on.

3. She Feels Like the Relationship is Predictable

Many people fall into the comfort of a routine. It’s easy, and it feel safe and relaxing. But many women can only do routine for so long when it comes to their relationship. They need spontaneous adventures, the occasional surprise date night, or even a simple but romantic gesture such as breakfast in bed or having her favorite coffee ready in the morning. Routine can make a woman feel like she isn’t important. If her partner isn’t surprising her every once in a while, she’ll get bored and move on.

4. Her Partner Criticizes Her Family and Friends

In-laws or future in-laws can be hard to handle. But as much as a woman’s partner might disagree with or be annoyed by her parents or other family members, constantly talking bad about them is never a solution. (This goes both ways!) And if a woman’s partner is always putting down her friends and family — the people she loves and cares about — it will only make her second guess her relationship. She will become defensive and start to feel distant from her partner, and eventually, she’ll probably leave.

5. She’s Not Being Acknowledged

If a woman’s partner is constantly ignoring her, talking over her, or making decisions that affect the relationship — without talking it over with her — she’ll feel like she doesn’t matter. If her partner is more focused on his phone or the T.V. when she’s trying to talk to him, she’ll feel like she isn’t even there. A woman needs a connection with her partner to make the relationship work. If she’s on a completely different page than her partner, there’s no reason for her to stay in the relationship. No one wants to be taken for granted.

h/t: power of positivity